[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
in the dragon s belly.
Why, a good laugh, of course. The monstrous coils relaxed
slightly. Any fool knows laughter s more nutritious than meat.
Doen look to me, then. Cleverness not my strong suit. Can t
recite my last will and testament and make jokes at same time, you bet.
Come on then, mate. Mudge hissed at his tall friend. Sing im
some funny songs or somethin . Meself, I think everythin you sing is silly,
but this ere tree-sized caterpillar obviously fancies imself somethin o a
connoisseur.
Mudge, I can sing rock and spells and ballads and blues. Even
some classical. But I m no Smothers Brother.
You re gonna be a smothered brother if you don t do somethin
fast. Please, mate, he pleaded, give er a try.
Yes, give it a try, man, The dragon s hearing was evidently as
acute as his vision. Help me try to forget the unhappy circumstances
engendered by that cursed distant relation.
Unhappy circumstances? Jon-Tom stammered. With that gaping mouth
so near it was difficult to concentrate.
The fact that I don t have any limbs, you limivorous biped!
Closing his eyes to shut out the sight of that bottomless maw,
Jon-Tom strove to recall a humorous tune or two. Try as he might, however, he
couldn t remember any of Newhart s sidesplitting ditties or those of any of
the other great recording comedians. He knew Hooray for Captain Spaulding
from Animal Crackers but doubted it would have any effect on the expectant
serpent coiled around them.
Part of the problem was that while he was used to dealing with
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serious life-threatening situations this was the first time he and Mudge had
faced a threat which insisted on being amused. It was enough to throw any
spellsinger off stride and off key. Difficult enough to play and sing when
one s hands were shaking and throat was tight without having to be funny at
the same time. He lightly strummed the suar s strings in the hope the music
might stimulate some humorous reminiscence, but none was forthcoming.
That s when he noticed Mudge arguing quietly with Weegee. Finally
she shoved him from behind until he was standing next to Jon-Tom.
I I know a joke, I do. The otter s whiskers were quivering.
The dragon shifted his attention from Jon-Tom. Do you now? Well
let me hear it, let me hear it. If I m sufficiently amused and not too hungry
when you ve finished I might let you go so you can tell it to another, though
I warn you that m hard to satisfy. It usually takes more than one joke and
more than one meal.
Is that right now, guv nor? We ll see, because this is the
funniest, most rib-ticklin , sidesplittin , uproarious, knee-slappin skip
that latter belJy-bustin story anyone ever card.
Bravo. Do tell me.
Jon-Tom looked sideways at the otter, searching for a sign, a clue
that Mudge was up to something. Instead of hinting that he was trying to put
something over on the dragon, the otter settled down to recite his tale. Not
knowing what else to do, Jon-Tom plucked at the suar. Perhaps the music might
serve to soothe their adversary somewhat while enhancing the quality of
Mudge s storytelling. Despite this determination he found he couldn t
concentrate on his playing. Even as he was still trying to think of an
effective spellsong, he found himself caught up in Mudge s tale. When he put
his mind to it, the otter could be engaging to a fault, and he was pouring
every ounce of personal charm and wit into what was developing into a lengthy,
complex story. Cautious was listening also. So was Weegee, even though she d
played a prominent part in convincing him to tell the tale in the first place.
For its part the dragon listened intently, its initial casual
indifference changing with the telling to enthralled interest. As Mudge
rambled on and on, beginning to use his acrobatic body and malleable face to
enhance various aspects of the story, the dragon s smile broadened in
proportion. It began to chuckle, then to laugh, and finally to bellow with
amusement, its lower body whipping convulsively and barely missing Jon-Tom s
head while snapping the crowns off a pair of small trees. It laughed and shook
and trembled with hilarity, and the only reason it didn t drown in its own
tears was that it had no tear ducts.
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Jon-Tom found himself smiling, too. Soon he, Weegee, and Cautious
were rolling about on the ground, holding their sides. Mudge was hard pressed
to retain his composure long enough to finish the extended joke and barely
managed to wind it up with a flurry of distorted expressions and a neatly
placed punch line. This grand finale resulted in sufficient hysteria to shake
leaves from the nearby trees.
Knowing something of the joke in advance, Weegee was the first to
recover her senses. She gestured and winked until her companions got the idea
and the four of them began, still laughing uproariously, to slink away through
the trees. Possibly the dragon saw them but in any event it was laughing too
hard to pursue.
That, wheezed Jon-Tom when they d made good their escape and he
could finally breathe freely once more, was the funniest story I ve ever
heard in my life.
I know. Weegee was leaning against Mudge and he against her.
Mudge told it to me one night on the ship to Orangel. I m sure I laughed so
long and so hard that the crew thought there was something seriously wrong
with me. I urged Mudge to tell it to the dragon. He made it even funnier this
time. That part about the Baker s College and the traveling lady s choir
always cracks me up. So saying she fell to her knees with renewed laughter,
clutching at her sore ribs. They were all aching from laughing too much.
I don t know. Jon-Tom wiped at the streaks on his face. I can t
get past the part where the elephant shows up.
And the six chimps, Cautious reminded him. Don t forget about
the six chimps.
This provoked a renewed outburst which resulted in all of them
rolling about on the ground. When this latest eruption of hysteria was over [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
zanotowane.pl doc.pisz.pl pdf.pisz.pl wyciskamy.pev.pl
in the dragon s belly.
Why, a good laugh, of course. The monstrous coils relaxed
slightly. Any fool knows laughter s more nutritious than meat.
Doen look to me, then. Cleverness not my strong suit. Can t
recite my last will and testament and make jokes at same time, you bet.
Come on then, mate. Mudge hissed at his tall friend. Sing im
some funny songs or somethin . Meself, I think everythin you sing is silly,
but this ere tree-sized caterpillar obviously fancies imself somethin o a
connoisseur.
Mudge, I can sing rock and spells and ballads and blues. Even
some classical. But I m no Smothers Brother.
You re gonna be a smothered brother if you don t do somethin
fast. Please, mate, he pleaded, give er a try.
Yes, give it a try, man, The dragon s hearing was evidently as
acute as his vision. Help me try to forget the unhappy circumstances
engendered by that cursed distant relation.
Unhappy circumstances? Jon-Tom stammered. With that gaping mouth
so near it was difficult to concentrate.
The fact that I don t have any limbs, you limivorous biped!
Closing his eyes to shut out the sight of that bottomless maw,
Jon-Tom strove to recall a humorous tune or two. Try as he might, however, he
couldn t remember any of Newhart s sidesplitting ditties or those of any of
the other great recording comedians. He knew Hooray for Captain Spaulding
from Animal Crackers but doubted it would have any effect on the expectant
serpent coiled around them.
Part of the problem was that while he was used to dealing with
Page 211
ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.html
serious life-threatening situations this was the first time he and Mudge had
faced a threat which insisted on being amused. It was enough to throw any
spellsinger off stride and off key. Difficult enough to play and sing when
one s hands were shaking and throat was tight without having to be funny at
the same time. He lightly strummed the suar s strings in the hope the music
might stimulate some humorous reminiscence, but none was forthcoming.
That s when he noticed Mudge arguing quietly with Weegee. Finally
she shoved him from behind until he was standing next to Jon-Tom.
I I know a joke, I do. The otter s whiskers were quivering.
The dragon shifted his attention from Jon-Tom. Do you now? Well
let me hear it, let me hear it. If I m sufficiently amused and not too hungry
when you ve finished I might let you go so you can tell it to another, though
I warn you that m hard to satisfy. It usually takes more than one joke and
more than one meal.
Is that right now, guv nor? We ll see, because this is the
funniest, most rib-ticklin , sidesplittin , uproarious, knee-slappin skip
that latter belJy-bustin story anyone ever card.
Bravo. Do tell me.
Jon-Tom looked sideways at the otter, searching for a sign, a clue
that Mudge was up to something. Instead of hinting that he was trying to put
something over on the dragon, the otter settled down to recite his tale. Not
knowing what else to do, Jon-Tom plucked at the suar. Perhaps the music might
serve to soothe their adversary somewhat while enhancing the quality of
Mudge s storytelling. Despite this determination he found he couldn t
concentrate on his playing. Even as he was still trying to think of an
effective spellsong, he found himself caught up in Mudge s tale. When he put
his mind to it, the otter could be engaging to a fault, and he was pouring
every ounce of personal charm and wit into what was developing into a lengthy,
complex story. Cautious was listening also. So was Weegee, even though she d
played a prominent part in convincing him to tell the tale in the first place.
For its part the dragon listened intently, its initial casual
indifference changing with the telling to enthralled interest. As Mudge
rambled on and on, beginning to use his acrobatic body and malleable face to
enhance various aspects of the story, the dragon s smile broadened in
proportion. It began to chuckle, then to laugh, and finally to bellow with
amusement, its lower body whipping convulsively and barely missing Jon-Tom s
head while snapping the crowns off a pair of small trees. It laughed and shook
and trembled with hilarity, and the only reason it didn t drown in its own
tears was that it had no tear ducts.
Page 212
ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.html
Jon-Tom found himself smiling, too. Soon he, Weegee, and Cautious
were rolling about on the ground, holding their sides. Mudge was hard pressed
to retain his composure long enough to finish the extended joke and barely
managed to wind it up with a flurry of distorted expressions and a neatly
placed punch line. This grand finale resulted in sufficient hysteria to shake
leaves from the nearby trees.
Knowing something of the joke in advance, Weegee was the first to
recover her senses. She gestured and winked until her companions got the idea
and the four of them began, still laughing uproariously, to slink away through
the trees. Possibly the dragon saw them but in any event it was laughing too
hard to pursue.
That, wheezed Jon-Tom when they d made good their escape and he
could finally breathe freely once more, was the funniest story I ve ever
heard in my life.
I know. Weegee was leaning against Mudge and he against her.
Mudge told it to me one night on the ship to Orangel. I m sure I laughed so
long and so hard that the crew thought there was something seriously wrong
with me. I urged Mudge to tell it to the dragon. He made it even funnier this
time. That part about the Baker s College and the traveling lady s choir
always cracks me up. So saying she fell to her knees with renewed laughter,
clutching at her sore ribs. They were all aching from laughing too much.
I don t know. Jon-Tom wiped at the streaks on his face. I can t
get past the part where the elephant shows up.
And the six chimps, Cautious reminded him. Don t forget about
the six chimps.
This provoked a renewed outburst which resulted in all of them
rolling about on the ground. When this latest eruption of hysteria was over [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]